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catscradle Feb. 7th, 2003 08:36 pm)
catscradle Feb. 7th, 2003 08:36 pm)My addendum to Nietzsche's Thus Spake, Zarathustra
When Zarathustra surveyed the crowd, his heart grew troubled, and he rent his garment. "Oh, me, oh my," he said, "should I have taught the overman when the apocalypse began?"
A dwarf tapped him on the shoulder, and he spun around in defiance. "Remember, oh great Zarathustra," the dwarf said mockingly, "you yourself have spoken of the great eagles that begin to spread their wings only when they feel the rising air currents from the approaching storm. Can you be such an eagle, Zarathustra, or should you succumb to the great disgust, the disgust that comes when you see that every time of trouble must become a time of confusion, and when those who speak cry out to hear an echo of their own voice?"
"You have spoken well," Zarathustra shot back, "but you have not spoken well enough. Were you to speak well enough, you would have carried your own fire to the valley and not merely commented on the pyrotechnics you saw below you. Isn't it all-to-human to comment on what has already been said, then comment further on what has been commented? No, you must have chaos in your soul to give birth to a dancing star."
"You sound like a religious preacher," the dwarf retorted with sarcasm. "Zarathustra, the great fundamentalist preacher of nihilism locked in polemical struggle with the metaphysicians. The metaphysicians will ultimately win, Zarathustra, because they are the ones who know how to sigh the ultimate sigh, the sigh we all long for, the sigh of certainty. You cannot compete with the preachers of truth, Zarathustra."
Zarathustra did not reply, because his was quite tired from his ordeal. He handed the dwarf an American flag sticker, and went back up the mountain. When he got to the top of the mountain, he found that his cave had been visited by vandals. All over the walls they had written in a strange white powder the inscription, "God is great."
At that point Zarathustra realized he had failed in his mission to bring down fire. He turned to his lion and his serpent and lamented, "My friends, what shall we do this halloween while the metaphysicians duke it out to the death?"
The lioned snarled. The serpent slithered. Neither had anything to say.
Zarathustra went quietly into the back of the cave and opened a copy of the Bible. At that moment there was an enormous earthquake, the cave was filled with a blinding light, and Zarathustra ascended, like Elijah, into heaven, never to be heard from again.
Years later a wandering archaelogist looking for the original golden tablets of the Book of Mormon stumbled into the cave. He saw the inscriptions on the wall, and ran away excited.
Soon thereafter the cave was declared a great, historical landmark. People of all the world's religions made regular pilgrimages to the cave and heard erudite lectures about how "truth" had been finally discovered in its original, material form. The white powder was now preserved with the latest, miracle technology, and the three little words were translated into all human languages.
Historians of philosophy for countless generations wrote about how Nietzsche had finally been proven wrong, for Zarathustra's "original autographs" had at last been discovered. The moral every school child learned was simple. Nietzsche, poor wretch, was not equal toe great truths taught by his mentor, Zarathustra.
When Zarathustra surveyed the crowd, his heart grew troubled, and he rent his garment. "Oh, me, oh my," he said, "should I have taught the overman when the apocalypse began?"
A dwarf tapped him on the shoulder, and he spun around in defiance. "Remember, oh great Zarathustra," the dwarf said mockingly, "you yourself have spoken of the great eagles that begin to spread their wings only when they feel the rising air currents from the approaching storm. Can you be such an eagle, Zarathustra, or should you succumb to the great disgust, the disgust that comes when you see that every time of trouble must become a time of confusion, and when those who speak cry out to hear an echo of their own voice?"
"You have spoken well," Zarathustra shot back, "but you have not spoken well enough. Were you to speak well enough, you would have carried your own fire to the valley and not merely commented on the pyrotechnics you saw below you. Isn't it all-to-human to comment on what has already been said, then comment further on what has been commented? No, you must have chaos in your soul to give birth to a dancing star."
"You sound like a religious preacher," the dwarf retorted with sarcasm. "Zarathustra, the great fundamentalist preacher of nihilism locked in polemical struggle with the metaphysicians. The metaphysicians will ultimately win, Zarathustra, because they are the ones who know how to sigh the ultimate sigh, the sigh we all long for, the sigh of certainty. You cannot compete with the preachers of truth, Zarathustra."
Zarathustra did not reply, because his was quite tired from his ordeal. He handed the dwarf an American flag sticker, and went back up the mountain. When he got to the top of the mountain, he found that his cave had been visited by vandals. All over the walls they had written in a strange white powder the inscription, "God is great."
At that point Zarathustra realized he had failed in his mission to bring down fire. He turned to his lion and his serpent and lamented, "My friends, what shall we do this halloween while the metaphysicians duke it out to the death?"
The lioned snarled. The serpent slithered. Neither had anything to say.
Zarathustra went quietly into the back of the cave and opened a copy of the Bible. At that moment there was an enormous earthquake, the cave was filled with a blinding light, and Zarathustra ascended, like Elijah, into heaven, never to be heard from again.
Years later a wandering archaelogist looking for the original golden tablets of the Book of Mormon stumbled into the cave. He saw the inscriptions on the wall, and ran away excited.
Soon thereafter the cave was declared a great, historical landmark. People of all the world's religions made regular pilgrimages to the cave and heard erudite lectures about how "truth" had been finally discovered in its original, material form. The white powder was now preserved with the latest, miracle technology, and the three little words were translated into all human languages.
Historians of philosophy for countless generations wrote about how Nietzsche had finally been proven wrong, for Zarathustra's "original autographs" had at last been discovered. The moral every school child learned was simple. Nietzsche, poor wretch, was not equal toe great truths taught by his mentor, Zarathustra.